The Visit

I was the youngest of nineteen grandchildren on my mother’s side.   I only saw my paternal grandmother a few times, only one of those times do I remember and I only saw my paternal grandfather once.   I was closest to my maternal grandparents, although I usually only saw them once a year.

When the air began to get cool and crisp and the pecans began to fall, I knew the time was approaching for the occasion to which I most looked forward each year: The Visit from Grandma and Granddad.    Bill and Lena  were my mother’s parents.   They were married almost sixty-seven years (Granddad was buried on their anniversary in 1990).   Even today, when I hear the term, “salt of the earth” my thoughts always go to images of them.   They were the kind of people who, in their seventies and eighties, were still bringing meals and doing work for the “elderly” in their church!   In personality, they were a little like the grandparents on The Waltons.   The theme song of that program always makes me think of them.   Grandma was always busy working and could sound a little sharp when she spoke and Granddad was quick with a joke or a wink.

My grandmother was an incredible cook, making everything from scratch, of course.   She made homemade chicken and noodles, pies, fried chicken, and so on goes the list.   My mother told me stories of dishes she remembered from her childhood.   Grandma made strawberry shortcake with layers of pie crust, sweetened strawberries, and real fresh farm cream.   She was famous for her sweet pickles and she canned everything from their garden.   Mama would tell the story of one of Grandma’s home births.   When the doctor arrived, he looked at all the filled Mason jars in the kitchen and wanted to know WHO had done that?   She had spent the entire day canning while in labor!

The visits I most remember are those they made to the farm when I was in elementary school.   My Aunt Pat would drive them to our house and she would stay for a day or two.   It was so exciting to see Aunt Pat.   I liked watching her and Mama together as sisters.   And Aunt Pat knew how to speak to and play with children.   I still have a miniature Strawberry Shortcake figurine she brought me one year.   She found out I liked Strawberry Shortcake but didn’t have any of the toys yet, so she made sure to bring one when she made the trip to take Grandma and Granddad back to her house.

Aunt Pat and Mama, second and third from left, top

As they arrived in fall, it was still pecan harvesting time.   We had quite a few towering old pecan trees of several varieties.   We spent every spare moment of daylight picking up pecans.   People laugh when I tell them how we accomplished our task.   We picked on our knees.   Starting at the base of the tree, we sat beside each other and began picking outward in rings.   As we searched, we had to move the leaves and they formed a ring to let the person beside you see where your area stopped.   We would pick the ground beneath the trees clean in this manner!   I wish I knew how many pecans Mama picked over the years.   She told people that the first year we moved there, the neighbors probably thought she was either  really short or very religious, since she was out on her knees so often!   Mrs. Carmel and Granddad were the only two people who could keep up with her when it came to picking up pecans or any other task.

While we were out picking up pecans, Grandma would stay inside, usually cooking.   We had a little television in our kitchen and she would keep it on as she worked.   I can remember her coming out every so often to tell us about the latest winner on The Price Is Right.   This is the show she would complain about and wonder why anyone watched!  

I also remember her coming out at some point on each visit and announcing the tally of chickens for that year.   My mom collected chickens and Grandma would count the total number each time she visited.   It always struck her as amusing because she said my mom couldn’t stand taking care of chickens as a girl and then she ended up having a kitchen full of them.

Evenings, we would visit and watch television, each of us with a t.v. tray on our laps, cozy in the living room warmed by a fire.   On the trays were cracked pecans that we would pick out so the meat could be put into freezer bags for storage.  One of the sounds from my childhood is the pecan cracker from Kent’s Nursery that seemed to be working without stop during the fall.

Granddad always called Mama his baby girl.   She was the youngest of six children.   He loved to fish and he was an amazing carpenter and craftsman, although not by trade.   When he visited, he and Mama often had some refinishing project to be done.   When Mama found out she was pregnant with me, they were refinishing this antique Duncan Phyfe table.  Granddad said when she came up the driveway after her doctor’s appointment, she looked like she was floating on air! 

Aunt Shirley called my mom one day and said her neighbors were getting rid of the table.   The owner kept it in the garage and was throwing his tools upon it!   As long as I can remember it was called my table and I loved caring for it and asking Mama to tell me the story of the day she found out she was pregnant with me.   Mama’s face as she told the story and the scent of lemon Pledge as I carefully polished “my table.”   It is now the centerpiece of our family celebrations and my daughters help me polish it.     

The table has seen many celebrations.

Another year, Grandad and Mama worked on this Hoosier cabinet.   It belonged to Mama’s best friend, Carmel and when she no longer wanted it, she passed it on to Mama.   It had several coats of paint and when they stripped it, they found the copper Hoosier label on the front.   Inside, the paper shipping label was still taped to the cabinet wall.   Mama took the doors off and had glass installed, so she could keep the doors closed for display.   It now holds vintage tablecloths and kitchenware that Mama collected for me, usually at garage sales.

Then, on another visit, Grandad made Mrs. Carmel a bench for her kitchen table.   When Mama saw the finished product, she decided she needed a bench, also, so Grandad made the one that now sits at the foot of our bed.   It is so nice to think of him as I walk through the various rooms of our home.   I think of the two of them, working and talking.   They were both meticulous when it came to making or refinishing items.   Everything was done slowly and carefully, with such care, pride and PATIENCE.   My conscience is pricked often as I look upon the beautiful finish of our table after I’ve literally gotten upset over spilled milk!   Such a connection with family through treasured items can never be assessed a value.

This is my favorite picture of Granddad. I asked my cousin Linda to take a picture of Granddad in his overalls because that’s how I always pictured him, and all the other more recent pictures we had of him were in his Sunday best.   The only thing about the picture is these were his nicer overalls.   I remember him in his striped, engineer-style overalls, bent at one knee picking pecans or bent over a piece of furniture, bringing it to its original finish.   I remember the feel of the buttons and clasps and the fabric of those overalls against my cheek  as I sat in his lap.   I can still hear his voice as he said, “Granddad loves you honey.”   

Even though I didn’t spend time with them very often, I learned so much from my grandparents.   I learned about the dignity of work and a job well done, kindness to those in need, marriage, wisdom and faith.   When the country song, “I Thought That He Walked on Water” was released by Randy Travis in the eighties, Mama and I thought of Granddad because that title captured how our “little girl” hearts thought of him.   He was a towering figure in our minds, full of kindness and love and I still miss him.  God gives us so many tiny glimpses into His Glory and the true joy that awaits us one day with Him.   In Granddad’s lap, I think I had an earthly taste of the happiness  of one day being a beloved child in the presence of my Heavenly Father for all eternity.

Applesauce Cherry Cake with Brown Sugar Icing

I was delighted to find this black and white print as I was cleaning and purging a few weeks ago. It is one of many from a summer photography course my sister took at Louisiana State University in 1983 or 1983. This was one of many vignettes Mama decorated with in our decidedly country kitchen. That’s her artwork on the painted pieces. As I look at this photograph, I can feel myself back at that house and in her kitchen that was usually full of incredible smells.

This recipe was one she made every year and I can taste the memories of fall on the farm as I bake it and eat it. I hope you enjoy it!

APPLESAUCE CHERRY CAKE w/BROWN SUGAR ICING

For anyone who likes an old fashioned spice cake, this recipe is for you.   Mama always made this during the fall and cut it into small squares, each with a pecan half centered on top, for a nice presentation.

Cake:

1 egg

1 1/2 cups sugar

1 1/2 cups applesauce

1 cup drained sour pie cherries

1/2 cup raisins

1 cup chopped pecans or walnuts

2 cups flour

2 tsp. baking soda

1 tsp. cinnamon

1 tsp. cloves

1/2 cup butter or margarine, softened

Mix ingredients well and bake 40 min. at 350 degrees.

Icing:

1 cup brown sugar

1/2 cup butter

6 Tbsp. milk

1/4 tsp. salt

3 cups sifted powdered sugar

Melt butter.   Add brown sugar and salt.   Boil hard for 2 minutes.   Stir constantly.   Remove from heat and add milk.   Bring to a full boil, while stirring.   Remove from heat and cool until lukewarm.   Add powdered sugar.

At the Base of A Pecan Tree

The first major cold front finally blew into our area.   It offered us relief from unseasonably warm temperatures that followed our seasonably hot summer.    Along with a welcome change in weather, Autumn has brought back memories of that season on our small farm in Louisiana.

The pecan harvest fell to women and children on our farm.   My father commuted thirty miles to the university where he taught and when he was home, any work he did was related to the cattle.   I would pick pecans after school, but for me, the real work —and the real memories—belonged to Saturdays.   On those mornings, I woke early and dressed in my warmest, oldest clothes.    Blue jeans that could take wet, grass stained knees and a too-large coat–previously the property of my parents or older sister– were basics in my pecan picking- ensemble.     A quick breakfast and then I headed outdoors, grabbed a bucket and prepared to hit my knees.

When I tell people about picking up pecans,   they sometimes share their own stories of spreading sheets on the ground and shaking trees to capture the nuts in their linen traps or of using long-handled, curved-spring devices to gather small numbers of pecans.   Our method was a little different and my adult mind can appreciate the lessons I learned at the bases of those majestic trees which canopied my childhood.

1. Just start at the beginning.    Mama usually picked pecans all week with her friend, Carmel.   Mrs. Carmel had six children, so on any given Saturday, you could find as many as nine people picking pecans on our farm.    The method was simple.   We lined up, at the base of the tree, with about two feet between each person.   Then, we dropped to our knees and began to search for pecans amidst the grass and leaves.   We picked in circles around the tree.

2. Make your own way while leaving a path to guide the way for others.   As we circled the tree, we would rake the leaves out of our way, leaving neat piles that formed concentric circles.   As the day progressed, those leaf circles made an extremely satisfying sight.    The leaves left a clear mark for the person beside you so that he could keep his path and know exactly how far to look for pecans in either direction.   Not only was I responsible for picking my area, but my work affected the path of the people on either side.    Only if we all kept to our path were we assured the ground beneath the tree had been cleanly picked.

3. Patience and deliberate action will eventually lead to harvest and bounty.   As we made our way around the tree in ordered fashion, we eyed little piles of pecans waiting to be gathered with no work needed to discover them.   After we had scavenged for single pecans scattered under leaves, the  discovery of those beautiful piles was always a little bit of pleasure in our day.    Our usual method of pushing leaves aside had to be altered when we picked pecans in our pastures, instead of the yard.    Our cattle were grass fed, which meant we planted ryegrass for the winter months.   Ryegrass is extremely delicate, so we had to gingerly feel for and lift pecans from their tangled snare so the grass for which we had paid and labored to plant would not be ripped from its roots.

At dusk on Saturday afternoon, we would drive thirty miles to sell our pecans at a fruit market.   There were two markets and we called to find out which one was offering the best price per pound.   Then, we poured all our pecans into sturdy burlap sacks which still smelled of cottonseed meal for our cattle’s vitamin/mineral mix.   Mrs. Carmel and Mama used that money for Christmas presents, so we reaped a concrete  reward on Christmas morning.   It always made Mama proud that she never touched money in the bank accounts to pay for Christmas presents, decorations, and foods.

4. Natural surroundings offer a peaceful environment for conversation, silence, work, and thought.

I always enjoyed being included in adult conversation.   It seemed to occur so naturally as we were joined in solidarity on our knees beneath the pecan trees.   I also learned so much about my mother and what it meant to be a woman from the conversations between her and Mrs. Carmel.   In addition to group picking, I was also required to pick up a half-gallon ice cream bucket of pecans after school.   That solitary time spent with my hands focused on a repetitive task gave me a chance to allow my mind to ponder and my imagination to wander.    The idea of seasons in my life was clear to me at an early age due to my life on the farm.   Over the year, I watched the cycle of the trees.   Bare grey, winter branches gave way to green leaves and tiny buds in the spring.   Over the summer, those buds would develop into bright green hull-encased nuts.   Finally, fall brought the browning of the hulls, as the pecans became visible and eventually fell to the ground.    As I grew older, God’s hand in the seasons of my own life became more real as I compared the cycle of nature with that of my faith.   In the silence of those fall afternoons created by God, I became comfortable with silence.    That silence would foster my longings for Him and His voice as I grew older.

Pecan picking was not a task I looked forward to –or appreciated –at the time.   Such is usually the case in our lives!   Looking back, memories of cool breezes, hot chocolate breaks, and the smell of bean suppers simmering on the stove take pride of place over annoyance at my time not being my own and my Saturday being filled with work instead of play.   Time tends to do that.   Mama never sat down and consciously planned pecan- picking as a formative activity for me.   It was an organic activity of our farm life.   As mothers, we provide opportunities for life lessons without even realizing it.   Everything doesn’t have to be planned and picture-worthy.    Simple truths can be learned in the most simple of tasks.  As a child, my heart and mind were being prepared for God while circling the base of a pecan tree on my knees.    Later, I would hear the voice of God as I knelt at the base of a reminder of the tree of our salvation: the crucifix.

Dear Lord,

May I approach the mundane and simple with a heart open to You and Your voice.   May I take the extra time to involve my children in household tasks.   May I be an example to them of approaching work with a grateful heart.   May we experience Your presence in the glories of Your creation and in simple silence.    May we always remember that we join our motherly tasks with those of Holy Mother Church to teach our children about God and help them to listen for His voice in their lives.   Amen.

— This post was also published at CatholicMom.com